Reasons for moving:
People move in together. Someone moves out. New babies call for bigger houses. The desire for a dog requires a place with a yard. A job takes you away to a new city. A desire for adventure takes you across an ocean. You go wherever the person you love needs you to be. Or the need to escape becomes too overwhelming to ignore.
If I was single right now, I could potentially do what I’ve always wanted to do, which is live abroad for a few years, spending a few months at a time in different countries all over the world until I found one that I just couldn’t leave for a while. I’ve never wanted to end up anywhere other than California, but I have always wanted that education and life experience that only travel has to offer.
The other thing I could do is move down to San Diego, the city I have always seen myself settling in. Really any beach town in Southern California would be acceptable, but there’s something about the laid back, groovy nature of San Diego that is immensly appealing to me.
I could move pretty much anywhere at this point in my life if I were single, because my work as a freelance writer doesn’t restrict my location in any way. But if I’m being completely honest with myself, if I were single and could do whatever I wanted, I would probably stay right where I am, where it’s comfortable and easy and nothing too exciting ever happens.
I’m not single. I have an amazing boyfriend who is looking to start his career as a chef. The only problem with that goal is that it is pretty much impossible to accomplish in Los Angeles at the moment. Every entry level position requires 3-5 years of experience. That’s right, I said entry level.
So we’ve been thinking about going somewhere we would both love–San Diego. But the more we think about it, the more issues start to crop up. The rent would be cheaper, the atmosphere would be better, the parking would be much less of a nightmare, but we’re not sure the job situation would be any better. He does have an opportunity to intern at a restaurant down there, but internships don’t have any guarantees.
And now, an opportunity has arisen. Through a family connection, it appears that my boyfriend could easily find a position in a great restaurant in Salt Lake City.
Yup, Utah. That place without oceans and with lots of snow. And Mormons.
My boyfriend already knows and likes the city because it’s where his dad lives, and he’s sure that he could be happy there. The rent would be dirt cheap, he’d be able to start his career on the best possible foot, we’d be able to get a dog, and I could continue my work without any interuption. All good things.
The problem… he’s pretty sure that I would hate it there. And at first I agreed.
At first. It took about five minutes of me staring at a wall before I was able to turn to him and say, “If you want to go to Utah, I will go with you.” And I will. It will be an adjustment, that’s for damn sure. But the more I think about it, the more I see the ways that it can work.
Volleyball, my sport of choice, it turns out is very popular in Salt Lake, so I would be able to have fun and meet new friends through that. My biggest fear is adjusting to the cold weather, but if we just find a place with a great heater and if I don’t go outside on the worst days (which I wouldn’t have to because I’d be working out of our home) and if I buy a whole new wardrobe, I’m pretty sure I’ll be ok.
Actually, I know I’ll be ok, because I’ll be with the man that I love, the man who loves me more than anything. There will be days when the cold drives me crazy, days when I’ll resent him for taking me so far away from the golden Southern California coast, days when I’ll think, “What the hell was I thinking?” But I’m positive that those days will be vastly outnumbered by the excitement of trying something new, of meeting new people and exploring new places, and of living my life with the person I’ve forgotten how to live without.
Nothing is settled, but if Utah wants us, then here we come.